heart

Wreck Me

heart

It happened. I said it out loud for no one else to hear but the Lord and myself. On Sunday, February 2nd, in Austin Texas, I said the words with tears streaming down my face. With a fully surrendered heart for the first time in my life I said it and I meant it.

“Wreck me.”

Communion. It’s such a sweet time for the church to remember the ultimate sacrifice. This is where I found myself on that windy day. The room was dark, music was playing and I sat evaluating. That was the drill. I’d reflect on my life, my journey with the Lord and any sin I may have been harboring.

I find myself often in this place of reflection. Thank you, Lord. Thank you for this life I am so undeserving of. Thank you for the blessings, I’ve learned to say them by name. Thank you for the struggles as I tearfully remember them in my mind. Then I remember how I grew in those seasons. I grew in areas I didn’t know I needed growth. I’m thankful for them. But honestly, I am thankful they are over.

It happens so quickly – becoming comfortable in the everyday.

It happens so quickly – becoming comfortable in the everyday. I’m thankful for my HEPA filtered central air and heating unit, my kind and non-needy friends, my healthy kids, my servant-hearted sweet husband and the overall ease of my life.

Lets be honest though, my easy life is not a reflection of the world. Children are dying from lack of food, shelter or basic medical services. Women are enslaved in sex trade. Marriages and families are falling apart. People are going to bed hungry. Brothers and Sisters are far from the Lord. But I am comfortable. I can’t see it. It’s not me. I feel unmoved. It’s not my job. My heart is detached to those problems that don’t live in my backyard.

So I will ask God to give me His eyes to view this world. To be broken by the things that break His heart. But do I listen? Do I see when He does? Or do I intentionally not make eye contact and walk into Costco.

What we pray may come with a cost, but what if we were okay with that? What if we lived true life abandonment and asked God to wreck us? Knowing that it may will come with a cost. We will hurt and feel pain, but we will survive and that process is good.

Lord, wreck me for the things that wreck you. If wrecking me means removing or challenging all that I hold most dear, but in the end I am closer to you, do it. Wreck me.

If wrecking me means my life would bring you glory, wreck me. Whatever the cost Lord, wreck me. Whatever wrecks you, wreck me.

If wrecking me means removing or challenging all that I hold most dear, but in the end I am closer to you, do it.
Wreck me.

Just like the parable in Matthew 25:14-30, our Master has entrusted us with His talents. Not only does God decide how many talents we each get, He also equips, passions and prepares us for the work. All we need to do is be faithful to do it.

God didn’t create us all the same, so there is not one solution. What might wreck you, may be different than what God will stir to wreck another. Regardless, God wants to invite us in on being apart of the work He’s already doing. What wrecks you?

The lost
The fatherless
The hungry
The unloved
The widow
The abused
The lonely
Your neighbor
Your city

The list is endless…
Maybe it’s a sin in your own life. Maybe you need to be wrecked first by a sin that entangles you before you can be wrecked beyond yourself.

Can I assure you of one thing? Most of us won’t have to go far to find what God has prepared you to do. Chances are there’s a relationship or opportunity that’s already presented itself. Are we willing?

So it’s said, I am not proposing we do more to busy ourselves, I am proposing we live our lives differently. We may need to say no to something great to open up margin in our life to do what God made us to do.

I, therefore, a prisoner for the Lord, urge you to walk in a manner worthy of the calling to which you have been called. Eph 4:1

Christ gave his life. He died a painful death. He was so wrecked over our separation from the Father that He gave His life. Willingly. Without hesitation. Jesus gave his life away so we would not have to know a life separated from Him. And what does He desire in response? To love Him and love others. (Luke 10: 25-27)

These words are spoken with shaken hands but a confident heart. Knowing the potential cost. Knowing that this might challenge my comfort, my ease and my security. May we be a generation that fights against living detached hearts to the things around us that break the Lord’s heart. May we BE BRAVE and ask together for the Lord to wreck us.

May we BE BRAVE and ask together for the Lord to wreck us.

For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand, that we should walk in them. Eph 2:10

I would love to hear from you. How has God wrecked you? What is God calling you to? Comment below or email me at: kdemanby@yahoo.com

 

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Katie Demanby

About

Katie went to school for 17 ½ years to receive a bachelors degree in social work. The titles she bares that she is most proud of are Babe, Momma, friend, sister and redeemed child of the most high God. She enjoys a good read, old things, action movies, avocados, strips, dating her husband, and Mexican food. Katie spends her days practicing sight words, throwing wiffel balls and feeding little mouths. She is momma to Logan, Luke and Ethan and wife to Travis. Her words will not always be the most eloquent but promises they will be honest. Katie’s most thankful that the Lord calls her His and is passionate about living that truth daily.


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